Deciding how to include family in your elopement, whether they’re present on the day or not, can be an unforeseen item on the planning list.
It can get tricky sometimes, can’t it? Narrowing down the guest list, telling people your plans, hearing objections over some people not being invited…
So let’s talk about it.
Table of Contents:
Short answer? You can totally invite some guests to your elopement.
It used to be that it was only a “true” elopement if it was just you. But eloping has evolved over the years into more of a state of mind. A “we can get married however we want” mentality that has empowered folks just like you to have the wedding day you actually want.
Personally, I currently cap things at 15 guests. There’s always a wee bit of wiggle room, but I have to set a number somewhere, you know? Otherwise things can very easily stray into “big wedding” territory, and that’s just not where I do my best work. Which you deserve.
As a quick note: I say “family” every so often, as that what most people are searching for. But most of the time, I prefer to say “loved ones” instead. Consider this an all-encompassing discussion about the people in your life.
Elopement days don’t always have the same sort of “group activities” as big weddings, so if you want to include your loved ones in the proceedings, here are some ideas:
Whether you’re eloping alone or have a large group of loved ones not present, here are some ides for including folks not physically with you on your elopement:
Here’s the truth of the matter: eloping can be tough for some loved ones to get on board with, whether they’re invited or not. And at the end of the day, it’s your wedding and lifelong memories.
On the other side of it, I totally get not wanted to upset anyone and have that hanging over you. It’s a balance, and it’s not always easy. Take all the time you need to sit with it and process everything.
If you really do want to elope alone or cut down the numbers, and people are giving you grief over it, there are different ways to handle the objections. It’s all going to depend on your own style and relationships.
Sometimes, people are upset because they don’t truly understand your elopement vision. Try explaining how excited you are about your plans, and how much you’re looking forward to everything you have planned. Start there, see if your genuine excitement and joy makes them reconsider their stance.
If someone is really on your case, clear and concise may be the easiest way to go. Let them know you won’t be changing your plans, and that you’d love to include them in one of the ways listed above (or not, you aren’t obligated to be nice to people who are being mean to you).
Again, end of the day, it’s your elopement, not anyone else’s. Your loved ones will understand, and if they don’t, that’s kind of on them, isn’t it? Their feelings aren’t your responsibility, and you absolutely deserve the wedding of your dreams.